Thursday, 21 January 2010

Fit for purpose

Last week, Mr Plummy Mummy's best friend and his wife were approved for adoption (for them to adopt, not to be adopted themselves!) in Scotland. This was a major milestone on a process that started in 2008. Their quest to be parents is an even longer one as they had already endured failed attempts at getting pregnant via IVF.
During this process, they were subjected to invasions into their personal lives, been on parenting and adoption courses, undertaken physicals and been told to lose weight (by an overweight doctor!). But now they are on the road to being parents and they are very happy. We don't know how long they will have to wait since the approval just means they can now be considered for a adoption. They have opted to go for a child from 4 above so maybe not as long as those hoping for a baby. We have our fingers crossed that they will be matched with a child soon as they will make wonderful parents.
The other day I caught a Radio 2 show about the orphans of Haiti and there were callers who said they would adopt kids from there. Said callers were shot down in flames by the expert (sorry didn't catch her name) who said the adoption process is so long in this country and the likelihood of being approved is low. Furthermore, any UK couple would be blocked from adopting from abroad. One caller rang in to say those women should adopt from here. It's a hard call, on the one hand there are people desperate to be parents and kids who want parents, on the other hand there is the question of taking children out of their environment and culture. One caller made a good point - that people here to should support Haitians to keep children in their country as with the awful loss of life, the children are needed to rebuild the society.
On a lighter note, I laughed when I read about the South Korea ministries that are sending their workers home to bonk and produce kids. This is apparently to alleviate the issues caused by a population growing old. Having been to Seoul and seen how diligently Koreans follow their bosses orders, I am sure there is a lot of earnest bonking going on over there. The reality though is that there needs to be an improvement in access to childcare to make it feasible for their workforce to have more kids.
The news this week has also highlighted the uglier side of parenting and shown that just because you can procreate, doesn't necessarily mean you are fit to do so. The ghastly story of the two boys who tortured some other boys. Today the news reported the torturers came from a horrific home environment where they saw their mother being abused, took drugs and watched horror films. What I find so strange is they were known to the local were parents who, IMHO, are not fit for purpose. It makes me think all parents should be made to go through the adoption type assessment of their fitness for purpose as parents. Then again, if me and Mr Plummy Mummy had to do that, we probably wouldn't have had tot as the delay would have made us too old to be considered fit.

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