Earlier this year, I applied for part time places at nursery for our 2 year old. One replied saying they had nothing available and would reconsider us in January. The other didn't even bother replying. I was secretly happy as I felt she was too young to go. And I was also quite reluctant to have someone other than me or my hubby change her. Then once the horrific stories of child abuse at nurseries this summer came out, I was very happy with my decision.
Life does throw curve balls. Last thing on Friday I got a call from the first nursery saying they could offer us afternoon sessions. I have been given the weekend to discuss with hubby and make a decision if tot should go.
I have to say this seems one of the hardest decisions of my life. I keep to and fro'ing.
IF SHE GOES: she makes new friends (I hope) and has some stimulation outside of mummy. Mummy gets time to clean the house, do the weekly shop and maybe in the long term, get a hobby or actually go back to work.
IF SHE STAYS: I know she is safe, we are free to decide each day what we want to do and I spend most of the day entertaining her. She laughs and sings all the time and even amazes us by singing the whole alphabet..we know she doesn't know what the letters are but her memory is remarkable. I see every development she makes and am amazed by what a wonderful child she is.
IF SHE STAYS: our house doesn't get cleaned, my nerves sometimes get frazzled by the relentless "What's that", "Why", "I don't like it" and "Please mummy PLEASE". If I spend any time on the computer, I feel guilty, then I feel annoyed as she tries to play with the keys and destroys anything I'm working on.
IF SHE GOES: she has not been left with anyone for over a year. She has never been left with a non family member or a very well known neighbour.
The nursery which only scored a Satisfactory with ofsted 3 years ago may not have the right staff to stimulate her, she may get bullied, she may get bored, she may pick up all sorts of colds and germs in general making her eczema go wild. Her routine will be disrupted as she has lately taken to napping in the afternoon. We go bankrupt with the cost of the sessions. The separation anxiety may be more than she can bear...OK more than I can bear.
What is the right age for a child to go to nursery I wonder and will we be able to decide by tomorrow? I hope so as she's getting confused about why mummy keeps grabbing her, holding on tight and showering her with kisses through teary eyes.